Show Reviews: Produce 101 Season 2 Episode 5

Ah, episode 5. The episode all P101 fans dread and anticipate: the first elimination. All fans of not popular trainees are sweating. Fans of popular trainees are ready to fight if their fave drops. It’s a stressful episode.

Luckily, to help relieve the stress, last year’s contestants Kim Sohye (my fixed pick from last year), Choi Yoojung, and Kim Sohee are here to narrate the going-ons.

The eliminations are dispersed through bonus behind the scenes videos and activities, so the way this post is going to be set up is that you’ll see all the bonus content in order, and then you’ll see a list of the 60 trainees who moved on with my commentary on them as a human person. I’m not going to bother covering the introductions because I have better things to do with my time.

Okay, let’s get going.

BoA’s Class

So BoA gives a lecture on training and becoming an idol to all the trainees. This is actually kind of a boring segment, but it’s kind of interesting to listen to. Clearly BoA’s story is a famous one, and the trainees must really look up to her, so they listen intently.

I think a lot of newer k-pop fans forget how big of a legend she really is. She’s been dominating the k-pop game since 2000. For reference, I was 6 that year. Some contestants on the show weren’t even born. She’s well known not only in Korea, but all across Asia. Hell, I knew who she was when I was still in the anime phase of my life.

Anyways, the topic of her story is about how she debuted in Japan and had the biggest voice crack of her career at her showcase. It was so bad she wanted to quit singing. But she tells the trainees how she thought about how much she loved performing and how she can’t live without it so she persevered through her own embarrassment.

The moral is: can you survive without singing?

YGK+’s Hyojun raises his hand to ask a question. He wants to know how to perform without forgetting what he’s doing. BoA just tells him basically to practice more because in this industry if you can’t perform you don’t have a job.

Harsh, but true.

Dancing King

This is the most important segment. I routinely go back and watch this segment.

Last year’s winners Choi Yoojung and Kim Doyeon host a ‘Dancing King’ segment to find out who the best dancer on the show is. This entire segment is gold and I love it.

They make Yoojung dance to Bang Bang for the umpteenth time since last season, and she kills it, as per usual.

And then the music drops and trainees literally storm the stage. One A kid does a flip but he’s the asshole abuser from Maroo so I don’t care.

First up is a b-boy battle between Kang Daniel and Joo Haknyeon. Daniel is miles above Haknyeon, who just looks like he was happy to be invited.

Next Samuel vs Jo Jinhyung, who I don’t think had screentime until this moment in time. Sammy dances circles around him

Next is Ong Seongwoo vs Kim Yongjin, who you’ll remember as the twerking boy from Mansae Team 2. I think Yongjin just went on stage to have a good time because there’s no way in hell he’d ever beat Seongwoo for anything in this competition, but especially not dancing.

Next is Main Gay Eunki vs Park Jihoon. Eunki completely destroys Jihoon. You know, I have to give it to Eunki because in the majority of his appearances in the show up until this point he has humped the ground while doing the splits. That’s determination. I’ll be rooting for your debut, boo. Please leave your agency.

When you know your opponent has nothing to hit you with

And then there’s the piece de resistance of this segment. Modern dance music plays and Eunki sails across the stage. While it’s supposed to be a battle between grades, fellow D-Ranker Jung Jung joins him and it’s beautiful. And slightly homosexual. But mostly beautiful.

I love that this comes immediately after Eunki humps the ground and does the splits, because his voice over literally states that his father thinks his dancing is an embarrassment.

Truly iconic and magical.

Then Yoojung forces Guanlin, who can’t dance, to come out on stage. He’s a good sport about it. You can see that his confidence has improved since his audition evaluation. It’s nothing spectacular, but I would call it decent enough for someone who really hasn’t danced before. It’s still better than anything I can do, at any rate.

Then it’s just a montage of less memorable group pairings.

The dancing ends with the lot of them coming out and dancing to IOI’s ‘Very Very Very’. Meme King Yoon Jisung effortlessly nails this.

They finally announce the Dancing King, who is none other than his Royal Majesty, the Main Gay himself, Hong Eunki. Because of his wonderful and beautiful floor humps he wins. All of group D win sneakers to celebrate this.

Exercise Class

So this segment starts off with the boys getting a rude wakeup call from ‘Nayana’, the song of the century (which somehow managed to make it onto my top 50 k-pop songs of the first half of the year I dunno how). They then get told they have ten minutes to get ready and to make it to the training centre. And insanity ensues. And it’s hilarious.

Same Dongho, same.

They make it to the training centre and this huge bulk of a man greets them. Seriously, I don’t know how people even get so buff I can’t even touch my own goddamn toes. Basically this guy is going to lead them through exercise activities, as if all the dancing these boys are doing aren’t enough.

Firstly, they measure shoulders, because why the ever loving fuck not. Minki does this stupid thing with his shoulders, and it’s the most notable thing he did on this program.

So they’re measuring based off of Kim Woobin’s shoulders, which are 57 cm across. Which is pretty broad in terms of shoulders.

Hyunbin is first: his shoulders measure at around 56 cm, which is proportional to his gargantuan height.

Next is Moonbok and we get this wonderful moment where the instructor has to push that magnificent mane of hair to the side. I would kill to have that opportunity. His shoulders are 54 cm across, which is amazing because Moonbok stands at around 4 bottles of shampoo tall.

You shouldn't be nervous you should feel goddamn blessed

Last is Daniel, who looks particularly like a rabbit in this scene. His beautiful shoulders measure at around 60 cm across. I’m swooning and so is little baby Woojin.

Next they do my least favourite activity, planks. Baby Woojin is my child and therefore has my soul and therefore also cannot do planks. This entire segment is full of memes, basically. They have to lift one arm up, and then as they get eliminated they have to move their legs apart and back together, which sends Woodam flying.

Lastly, they have to plank and wrestle their opponent down. Seunghyuk wins easily, but not without expressing his fear of going against fan favourite Park Jihoon.

This kid is self aware please save him

Arm Wrestling

This is the best of the side events. Both teams for each song battle for pride with arm wrestling. This is long, so I’ll only include the highlights.

• -       Some of these kids have amazing muscles (including literal daddy Park Sungwoo). Some don’t.

•     They also try to intimidate each other. Some of them have better technique than others.

• -       The best part of this entire thing is Dongho’s complete domination over Boy In Luv Team 1. Seriously, he brings all of them down.

• -       This is yet another thing that reminds me of Kangin and yes I still hate myself for this.
• -       Also I guess Haknyeon was being a jerk towards Guanlin so Dongho needed to enact revenge.

This segment just made me so happy I dunno why.

Visual Ranking

So the boys get to rank who they think the top visuals of the show are. I’ll list them below and give my impression of them as a visual (and as a human being).

11. Lee Yoojin, Namoo Actors: He is quite handsome. It may sound strange, but I adore his nose.

10. Ong Seongwoo, Fantagio: Personally, I would rank him higher. I find him absolutely stunning. Also I love his ears. I’m a sucker for men with interesting ears; it’s literally half the reason why I stan Park Chanyeol in EXO.

9. Kwon Hyunbin, YGK+: Completely agree. He’s absolutely gorgeous (which is why he’s a model) and is super tall, which is something I desire in a man.

8. Park Sungwoo, HIM: I love how they tease that Jisung is the one who’s going to be chosen, but it’s Sungwoo. He’s definitely good looking and I would love to stand next to him and look like a potato.

7. Choi Minki, Pledis: 100% agree. He’s not a manly type, but in terms of visuals I’ve always thought that he’s one of the tops in the industry. He’s so good looking he was the only member of Nu’est that I knew before this show started.

6. Ahn Hyeongseob, Yuehua: You can’t deny that he’s a cute kid. He’s underage so I’ll stop there.

5. Yoo Seonho, Cube: Another underage cutie. But yeah, this kid is gonna be a top visual in the industry.

4. Hwang Minhyun, Pledis: If you want a representative of my ideal type in k-pop, here you go. It used to be Chanyeol but then I discovered who Minhyun is. He’s tall, has a kind face, a good personality, what more could a girl want?

3. Lai Guanlin, Cube: When Seonho and Guanlin debut in the next Cube group they’re gonna get so many fangirls I swear to god.

2. Bae Jinyoung, C9: Okay I adore this kid, but I don’t see what about him is a top visual? He’s not ugly, but he’s not more handsome than others in the competition.

1. Park Jihoon, Maroo Entertainment: Again, I don’t get it. Maybe it’s because I don’t dig the cute look, but honestly I don’t think he’s the number 1 visual.

Ghost Prank

This is everyone who isn’t me favourite segment. Basically, the staff tell the boys that they need to talk to themselves in the mirror. But, just as it gets emotional, the boys are scared with a ghost. That’s it; plain and simple. I’ll just post about the highlights.

• -       The girls who are narrating the episode get to go full ham and cheese on their acting for this one
• -       Jonghyun telling the ghost to scare Minki really well
• -       Cue Minki freaking the fuck out
• -       Ong imitating the famous painting “The Scream”
• -       The origin of Samuel yelling “OH MY GOD”
• -       Dongbin telling himself to stop crying and then getting scared and immediately crying again
• -       Ha Sungwoon clapping like a fucking seal
• -       Hyeongseob throws a fucking chair
• -       Hyeongseob then asks to meet the ghost and then all but screams in her face in fear
• -       Dongho is ready to fight the ghost.
• -       And then he deadass asks the ghost if she’s Minki I love this man
• -       Sanggyun tells himself he looks handsome. The world agreed. And then he got scared.
• -       Guanlin has the most deadpan scared reaction I have ever seen
• -       Seonho is also ready to fight until they show him the ghost for a second time
• -       Moonbok has a really emotional speech which gets ruined by the entrance of the ghost

Explanation Time

In this segment the trainees get to explain and talk about things that are asked to them or bother them. Here are the highlights.

• -       The Pledis boys all berate Dongho for not taking care of himself when all he did was look like a muthafucking man
• -       Jonghyun explains that he’s not losing his hair
• -       The MMO trainees have to explain that they’re not originally comedy trainees, that they are idol trainees, and, yes, Jisung has always been like this it’s not an act
• -       Noh Taehyun says he thought people were calling him a juice-like idol because he looks refreshing, but it’s actually because he cried once. Apparently he’s not much of a crier.
• -       Jihoon talks about how he’s called a fashion terrorist, but he honestly thought the clothes he wore were cute. They’re not, sorry boo.

Ranking by Demographic

So one interesting thing that’s done this season is that they show which trainees are most popular in which demographic. This is what we learn:

• -       Park Jihoon is popular among viewers in their teens and twenties, whereas Daniel is the most popular with viewers in their 30s (though he’s popular among all demographics)
• -       Jisung is also popular among all demographics
• -       They decide that because of his popularity with older viewers, Daniel might become Jihoon’s main competition, which is hilarious in hindsight
• -       Moonbok is preferred by male viewers, and Jihoon is preferred by female viewers.
• -       Daniel is popular among both genders
• -       Samuel and Jisung are also popular among both genders
• -       Joo Haknyeon doesn’t appear in the male demographic at all

Eventually the girls decide that they can’t predict who will be first from these rankings.

Ranking

Okay, so the following is the rankings, in order from 59^th to 1^st, with my commentary of them as a human being. Because that’s how I decided to do this and I’m sticking to my laurels here. 60^th will be revealed last because that’s what they did on the show I don’t make the rules here, okay?

59. Yoon Jaechan, The Vibe Label: I never really noticed this kid. He’s the one Jisung replaced as centre for ‘10 out of 10’

58. Lee Kiwon, 2Y: Who?

57. Lee Insoo, Independent: Ah yes, P101’s very own Whistle Blower. He was the centre for Boy in Luv team 2. He’s apparently an incredible rapper.

56. Yoo Hoeseung, FNC: This kid is a vocal genius. Please support his debut with N.Flying.

55. Park Woodam, HF Music Company: The shining star from the song evaluation. If his performance had been aired in episode 3 and not 4 I guarantee he would have gone up a lot higher than this.

54. Kim Nahyung, S.How Entertainment: The love of my life. If there was any justice in the world he would be first, because he’s beautiful and talented and lovely. But there isn’t justice in the world so he’s 54^th. That’s okay because I can still look at his beautiful face and support his (re)debut.

53. Kim Yongjin, Wings: Everyone’s favourite twerker. This kid got a lot of pity votes, to be honest, but he’s a good boy.

52. Byun Hyunmin, K-Tigers: This is the kid that does all the amazing flips.

51. Seo Seunghyuk, WH Creative: And this is the moment that I started crying watching this the first time around. He was ranked 95 during rank 3, and suddenly he rises up to 51^st. This child deserves the world. And he can’t stop crying during his speech and neither can I.

50. Jung Jung, Yuehua: Another kid who flips. As I said in my very first review, it is a goddamn shame that Jung Jung never got the focus he deserved. How can you just ignore a good looking guy who does mother fucking backflips?

49. Yeo Hwanwoong, RBW: Another kid who was shafted in screentime. You can tell how much the other trainees love him, and how great of a dancer he is. Also I have no idea how to spell his name.

48. Lee Yoojin, Namoo Actors: Who?

47. Ha Minho, The Vibe Lable: The worst part about this is that he was one of my favourites, and then it turned out that he was a shitty human being. I feel cheated. I was so invested in his storyline. Fuck.

46. Kim Seonglee, C2K: Okay, so Kim Ryeowook from Super Junior is my ultimate male bias and everyone keeps telling me that Seonglee looks exactly like him. Besides having superior vocal technique, I don’t see it. Also, how the fuck do you spell his name. Is it Seonglee? Seongri? Seungri? Who the fuck knows.

45. Joo Jinwoo, MMO: While not the MMO trainee I was hoping to join the obvious (Daniel and Jisung) (I wanted Jaehan), I was very happy with this. He carried Call Me Baby Team 2, and he’s talented and good looking to boot.

44. Lee Gwanghyun, Starship: The Starship trainee who’s not Sewoon. He’s cute, and my friend told me he has a Hamtaro vibe to him so I guess he’s okay. He’s certainly not offensive in any way.

43. Kim Sanggyun, HUNUS: One of my men. He’s talented and good looking and fun and I love him and I’ll fight you for him.

42. Woo Jinyoung, HF Music Company: I love this kid. He was one of the best rappers on the show. I believe it’s episode 7 where he gets his moment, so stay tuned.

41. Lee Junwoo, FENT: Who?

40. Kim Yehyun, Widmay: Look at this cutie. I had no idea that he’s still in high school. He has an amazing musical sense though, as we’ll see next episode.

39. Kim Donghyun, Brand New Music: My favourite BNM boy. He’s just such a soft cutie that I just want to cuddle him and make sure that he’s alright. I just want to protect him is that so wrong? And he's already releasing music what a king. 

38. Kim Taewoo, NARDA: Besides being a subtle meme, this kid is nothing special. I keep forgetting about him.

37. Kim Donghan, OUI: I honestly don’t know much about him, but he’s cute. I think he’s also a little strange too, but I have no concrete proof to back that up.

36.  Hong Eunki, GON: Our main gay. I love this kid I want the world for him. He deserves so much better. PLEASE LEAVE YOUR COMPANY.

35. Jong Dongsu, S.How: My other man. King of vocals. Deserves more. Support his (re)debut. 

34. Kim Yongguk, Choon: I literally had no impression of this kid until episode 6. He’s cute though.

33. Kim Dongbin, Kiwi Media Group: My son. He’s so cute and he tries so hard. My wish is for him to move past his stage fright and become something wonderful.

32. Kim Taemin, Hanahreum Company: It’s too bad that this is really the last we see of Taemin. He had to leave due to his health, but he was a solid meme while he lasted. He’s going to be an actor, so support him.

31. Justin, Yuehua: Someone deadass yelled “Justin Bieber” when this kid got called. Who was it? I want to fight them. Also, this kid is so confusing. He can’t decide if he’s cute or if he wants to be a ‘hot’ teenage boy like the viners of days gone by.

30. Yoon Heeseok, Jellyfish: Not only does this guy look like Vixx’s N, but he’s also an engineer. What more could a girl ask for?

29. Lee Gunhee, RBW: A meme. A meme with a voice. A meme who can outsing all other memes. A meme with a mouth that can swallow galaxies.

28. Takada Kenta, Star Road: This kid is the cutest, best looking, centre material. There’s a reason why he has so many international fans; you just can’t ignore his charm.

27. Im Youngmin, Brand New Music: P101’s resident alpaca. He’s a great rapper and a great leader. He does not and did not deserve the shit storm that came flying his way. His music is 10 out of 10. 

26. Noh Taehyun, Ardor & Able: By far the best dancer on the show. I’m so glad that he and HOTSHOT are finally getting the recognition they deserve. Go listen to ‘Jelly’right now.

25. Kim Taedong, The Vibe Label: It almost hurts to write down that company’s name because he did. He got up and left his fucking shitty ass label. Fly my Vampire King. Fly and go somewhere that will appreciate you and take care of you.

24. Park Woojin, Brand New Music: Kim Sohye was my fixed pick during season 1, and Woojin is her fixed pick so basically I love my snaggletoothed child. His dancing is among the best this season, and he’s a decent rapper to boot.

23. Kwon Hyunbin, YGK+: This kid is worried that he’ll get hate if he’s this high. Look what you did assholes, you made a perfectly good child nervous.

This is the story of how Mnet fucked up a perfectly good boy

22: Park Sungwoo, HIM: My old man takes his place. He tries his best, god bless him.

21. Ha Sungwoon, Ardor & Able: You haven’t seen it yet, but this cutie (one of the few who’s actually my age!) will sing the socks off anyone listening. Also he’s short. He’s short and he fucking knows it.

20. Kang Dongho, Pledis: It’s not a secret that I love this man. I’m so glad the accusations made against him were all but proven to be false, because I don’t think my heart could take that.

19. Choi Minki, Pledis: As I’ve said before, he was the only member of Nu’est I knew of before this show. Unfortuantely, this show basically tells me nothing about his personality, only further proving to me that he’s good looking

18. Lee Woojin, Media Line Entertainment: My son, my child. He got a huge boost in popularity from being paired off with Daniel, but I’m glad he’s gotten to show off his talent. I love how he says that he has many hyungs, not just Daniel. Not that Mnet shows it off or anything. His talent never ceases to amaze me. 

17. Lee Euiwoong, Yuehua: All I know about this kid is that he has cute ears, decent rapping skills, and a completely unpronounceable name.

16. Jaehwan, Independent: Godly vocals. Undiscovered meme potential, but we’ll get to that another day.

15. Yoo Seonho, Cube: I love how he just knows it’s him. He knows that Guanlin is more popular than he is. This kid has a wonderful career ahead of him.

14. Jang Moonbok, ONO: This came as a huge shock the first time around because he was one of the most talked about trainees. Everyone said that he basically had a confirmed debut with the final 11. We were all wrong. That being said, he's not the hip hop president for nothing, right? 

13. Jung Sewoon, Starship: This kids a cutie. I can’t wait for his inner dork to be shown more.

12. Bae Jinyoung, C9: I never understood why Jinyoung was so amazingly popular this early on. He never had a chance to show his personality or skill. It’s amazing.

Now, at 11, we’re at the current debut lineup. Only the top 11 get to debut. It’s interesting to see how this changes as the show goes on.

11. Hwang Minhyun, Pledis: The fact that I didn’t know who Minhyun was before this show makes me very angry because he’s basically everything I want in a man and more.

10. Joo Haknyeon, Cre.ker: I’ve never been a fan of Haknyeon. He seems like an okay kid and I’d defend his honour, but I’m not a big fan of his personality or his skills. More on that another time. Like Jinyoung, I don’t get why he was so popular at the beginning of the show.

9. Lai Guanlin, Cube: I adore this kid. He seems very hardworking and has a good personality. I also don’t understand how he got so popular so fast, but he did. His skills improved dramatically in a short amount of time. He’s still not great, but he did improve.

8. Kim Jonghyun, Pledis: The nation’s leader. What more is there to say? He is a sweetheart who deserves the world but the world does not deserve. So pure and good; a true cinnamon roll.

7. Lee Daehwi, Brand New Music: This was a shock. Daehwi had always been one of the most popular and then he dropped to 6^th. This can be attributed to his attitude controversy, which he does recover from. It does make me sad that he thinks he needs to apologize for people finding him ugly. He’s cute and people need to get over it.

6. Ahn Hyeongseob, Yuehua: I’m fairly certain that this kid got into the top 11 based on his wonderful personality. He seems like a hard worker. I don’t think he’s necessarily the most talented (I’ll never understand how he got into A to begin with), but he has a nice charm to him.

5. Kang Daniel, MMO: One of my all-time favourites. He’s charismatic and talented and seems nice to boot. Also he’s incredibly handsome, which plays a strong role in it. He’s a character that everyone can like, and I think that it shows.

The top 4 gets a huge moment as they’re revealed on the big screen. The Top 4 are Maroo’s Park Jihoon, MMO’s Yoon Jisung, Fantagio’s Ong Seongwoo, and Brave Entertainment’s Kim Samuel.

4. Ong Seongwoo, Fantagio: My fancy eared boy. He’s one of the standout dancers of the lot and a strong singer as well. He’s also another cutie and is very handsome. And he’s a big ball of meme-potential so he’s great.

3. Yoon Jisung, MMO:  Fuck I love this guy. He’s all jokes, all handsome, and all talent. You can tell that all the trainees love him, and it’s a pattern we see for the rest of the show. He really has a knack for taking care of people and I love him for that. All the antis can suck my dick.

HE DESERVES THIS YOU CAN MOTHERFUCKING FIGHT ME YOU FUCKERS he's had his dream pulled from him too many times for you to drag him down. He's spent his LIFE dreaming of this and he can't believe that he actually ranked this high. Let him live. 

2. Kim Samuel, Brave: Despite what I say about Namhyung, it’s Samuel who was my fixed pick the entire season. I couldn’t vote, of course, but he’s my number 1. I’ve been supporting him since he was at Pledis and supported his debut as Punch in 1Punch. He’s so young and has so much talent and so much heart. I want only the best for my son.

1. Park Jihoon, Maroo: I really don’t have much to say about Jihoon because I’m really just lukewarm towards him. He’s decently talented and seems like a nice kid, but I’m just not feeling him. I really don’t think a single wink should ever be that powerful though.

And now for 60^th place. The four who are in the running for it are independent trainee Kim Sangbin, independent trainee Choi Dongha, The Vibe Label’s Sung Hyunwoo, and 2Able Company’s Joo Wontak.

60. Kam Sangbin, Independent: And with that, all of the A ranked trainees move on to the next round. Sangbin isn’t someone I noticed much, but he’s a strong rapper.

Sung Hyunwoo, who had risen from 84^th, got 61^st. You can’t help but feel bad for him.

The show ends with a montage of the trainees saying goodbye to each other. There’s a lot of tears and most of them are mine. The most heartbreaking moments are when Moonbok runs to his best friend Hyunwoo, and when Dohyun tells Seonghyuk he’s the only one from Schock team 1 to survive.

So many tears.  

Random Moments:

Whoever styled Samuel today did a shit job and he shouldn’t have bleached his hair blonde to begin with it doesn’t look good.

Who told him that this was a good look? Who? I'll fight them!

 A superior pose for superior men. 

When you don't want to look but you can't look away

Further proof that Hyeongseob is a child that I birthed from my own body

I literally gasped

This was supposed to be an expectation vs. reality thing but I fucked up the screen shots and I'm not going back to take them again you can all guess how this went just from using your own goddamn brain

EXCUSE ME DANIEL IT IS ILLEGAL FOR YOUR BELLY TO BE THIS GODDAMN ADORABLE 

Me, every morning when I have to wake up to go to work

Someone help this child

Your best was enough. I love you. 

How can anyone be so perfect?

Look at how much they love each other. These 5 boys have had their debut taken away from them so many times. Jisung's been through like 5 companies himself. They've been through so much together they love each other so much. I support real men and their friendship with each other. 

At first glance I couldn't tell who this Sehun lookalike was, but then I realized that it was Namhyung. You can tell by the beanie and the perfect face. 

FUCKING REKT

Eunki is out here doing the most

Could you imagine what the show would have been like if Jihoon hadn't magically transported himself to fame and stardom?

And here's the start of a beautiful friendship. I still don't understand how they became friends though they literally don't work together until the third mission literally what the fuck? 

And thus my review of episode 5 comes to an end. I took too many pictures and this took me too goddamn long. Hopefully it was worth it though. I'll either be posting episode 6 next or the first episode of Idol School. I also hope to get some song reviews in. Please look forward to that. 

Until next time!