After the
general boringness of the first two episodes of Produce 101, Episode 3 finally
gets into more of the actual program and the #mess everyone was looking forward
to. Unlike the first two episodes, I’ll be going more scene by scene of the
show, as we finally get a solid narrative and timeline. Performance reviews
will be closer to the end, followed by interesting moments that I love.
With that
being said, let’s begin.
This
episode begins with a montage of the trainees practicing “Nayana” trying to
show us their T-ARA brand determination to the cause. And if Whistle-blower Lee
Insoo is anything to go by, they really did do the most, like sacrificing all
of their sleep for this. I don’t blame them though, “Nayana” is a tough song,
both choreo wise and singing wise.
It also
shows the trainees writing in their diaries and we hear voice overs about how
this is Their Dream™. It’s all very touching, but let’s
be real we’re watching this show for the mess and not much more.
Finally,
their levels get moved, so I’ll just list off the important ones and events.
- · They do an absolute dick move to the A rank trainees by making them wait until all the new level A’s are in the room to know if they got moved I would have been livid I might have punched BoA in the face
- · Pledis’ Choi Minki gets moved down to F and it’s honestly the saddest moment he deserves better. This is also the most screen time he gets all season.
- · Guanlin also gets moved down to F from D and honestly it’s the best place for him
- · A bunch of the Yuehua trainees move from C to D
- · Pledis’s Hwang Minhyun also moves from C to D and you can see Kim Jonghyun have a complete mental breakdown
- · Byun Hyunmin moves from F to C and does his first of many flips that encompass literally 99% of his screentime lmao RIP
- · Takada Kenta moves from C to B and I hope you’re not attached to this kid you’ll hardly see him again
- · The show’s golden boy Park Jihoon also moves from C to B, forever proving to me that he’s really just an average performer
- · Pledis’ Kim Jonghyun moves up to B and really he always seemed to me like the only one from Pledis in the early stages who actually gave a shit about improving and not losing confidence so I wasn’t really that surprised
- · One of the kings of deserving better, Woo Jinyoung, moves from C to A and none of the original A rank trainees are happy because they don’t know if they’re staying or not
- · Yuehua’s Ahn Hyeogseob, who’ll you remember from last episode as being the one who apparently couldn’t sing but really could, literally runs to the A level training room and trips in. A child after my own, clumsy heart.
- · Vampire king Kim Taedong moves all the way from F to A. I love this man he literally looks like a vampire in the best way and if his debut with his company isn’t a VIXX copycat vampire concept I’m going to revolt
- · Kim Sangbin moves from B to A. I honestly never noticed this guy much, but he’s alright.
- · Kim Seongri also moves up and I noticed him even less. Good singer though.
- · Brand New Music’s Im Youngmin also goes to A. He’s one of the trainees I got attached to he’s a cutie pie
- · Maknae Lee Woojin also moves up due to diligent practice and having a voice that hasn’t cracked yet so he can actually hit the required notes
- · Kang Daniel also goes up to A and Mnet uses this time to show us how he’s Lee Woojin’s new father. He also claps for himself because no one else wants to.
- · And surprise, surprise none of the original A rank trainees move down. Poor guys were given a lot of stress for nothing.
So after
all the groups are chosen we get the centre choosing competition. Basically,
all of the A rank trainees will get a moment to show what they got. I guess
I’ll just list out what I see as well because lord knows I can’t think of a
better way to do this.
- · Daniel is first. He couldn’t memorize his fucking lyrics though so we all knew that he wasn’t going to get it. His rap is okay. His entire performance is pretty lacklustre to be completely honest.
- · Park Woojin is next, A.K.A the Brand New Boy no one in the competition seems to remember. This is actually hilarious because by the next week everyone forgot who Kim Donghyun was in favour of Woojin. He has an advantage because no one can remember what he’s actually capable of doing. He wows everyone by doing an awesome dance routine with a freestyle rap.
- · Im Youngmin goes next and before he starts you hear him say that he prepared something similar to label-mate Woojin. He has an okay rap.
- · Sangbin also raps. He’s okay.
- · Namhyung raps as well. He’s actually the best rapper in the competition, not that any of the clips do him any justice. The main point is he’s beautiful and would have been a perfect centre and we all lost because we all know he didn’t become the centre. Still the best looking man in this competition.
- · Woo Jinyoung is yet another rapper and he’s one of the better rappers this season. He’s #smol and has pink hair and is all around pretty solid.
- · Clumsy, small boy Ahn Hyeongseob comes next. He just does the actual dance for ‘Nayana’. You’ll probably see it said that he probably shouldn’t have been an A and I agree. He’s not quite there yet. Adorable though.
- · F to A Vampire Overlord Kim Taedong goes after. He does a dance performance and fucks up really early on. He’s sexy as hell though so it’s alright.
- · Baby Lee Woojin is next and he’s basically 99% of the way to winning by being adorable AF. He sings beautifully and does a basic dance that’s still cute and HE’S TRYING SO HARD OKAY.
- · Sungwoon comes next and he sings but doesn’t do anything particularly extraordinary.
- · Seongri is even less extraordinary. Though he does a little flip thing at the end. That’s cool.
- · Sungwoo, King of the Ears, pops for his performance as he says he has no rivals when it comes to dancing.
- · Taehyun immediately comes next and out-dances him, naturally.
- · Samuel is next and he raps and does his little dance thing.
- · Daewhi is last and deadass just performs last season’s “Pick Me” much to my disappointment. Could he seriously not come up with anything better?
So it comes
down to Lee Woojin and Lee Daewhi. We all know that it should be Kim Namhyung
but because God is dead we can’t have nice things. Honestly I would have put Samuel
over Daewhi but as we all know Samuel isn’t allowed to get anything he wants so
he’s not even a final candidate. Daewhi wins and honestly I can’t figure out
why? He’s a cute kid but his stage was so lacklustre.
They show
the trainees entering the M-Countdown stage and it goes exactly how you expect.
The A kids get all the glory and some of the F ranked kids literally cry and I
just want to cuddle them and tell them everything is going to be alright. Minki
literally has to leave because he’s crying and I’m crying too. Minhyun
confronts the situation by telling the F trainees how much they support the
other ranks and I’m still crying and you are too.
At any rate
this whole segment is pretty boring.
Except for all the thirsting over Kenta which is something I 10/10 understand.
Here's the Nayana stage, in case you've managed to not watch it somehow.
Except for all the thirsting over Kenta which is something I 10/10 understand.
Here's the Nayana stage, in case you've managed to not watch it somehow.
Finally, we
get into the good stuff, which is them picking teams for the song evaluation.
Last season the A ranked girls fought for their songs and then chose their
members; there couldn’t be more than one A ranked trainee in one group. This
season, however, they choose the members first and then the song. The person
who chooses the members is randomly selected, except for Lee Daewhi, who gets
first pick because he’s centre. He chooses all the popular kids and Ha
Sungwoon.
If you’re
wondering why Daehwi got so much hate during the first few episodes, it’s
because of this picking scene. He literally called his group the ‘Avengers’.
Minhyun
chooses next and his group becomes an issue for entirely different reason. This
group was nicknamed ‘Justice League’ because every member had a strong
attraction and good skill (minus Hyunbin, but that’s for another day).
The other
teams are fairly inconsequential except for the group made of leftover trainees
no one wanted. You can’t help but feel bad for them.
To choose
the songs, the member who choose the team gets to race to choose the song. Only
the first person to get to a song and bring it back to the start gets to choose
it. The other half of teams who don’t get the song they wanted have to wait to
be chosen as competitors by another team. For obvious reasons, the leftover
team gets picked first. Minhyun’s ‘Justice League’ is the last one chosen
because no one wants to face that power.
There’s
then some random moments of groups practicing before the actual stage and
everything gets centred around one group for a while. Some highlights include:
- · Replay Team 1 saying Replay Team 2 isn’t cute (idk why though because Sanggyun is in that group and he’s a cutie. Also the kid who’s name I can never remember but low-key reminds me of BTS’ Jimin)
- · Kim Dongbin begging to be the centre of Call Me Baby Team 2 and Jinwoo staring into his soul like “y boi y u doin’ this”
- · Professional asshole Ha Minho taking complete control of Sorry Sorry Team 1 without his teammates complaining.
- · Jonghyun became the nation’s leader
- · Sungwoo becoming the centre of Sorry Sorry Team 2 mainly by being hot but also through dem memez
- · Assertive Noh Taehyun ends up being more assertive than 10 out of 10 Team 2 leader Park Woojin. This whole scene is actually kind of sad.
- · 10 out of 10 Team 1 hilariously trying and failing to do the required acrobatic choreography.
- · Smol bean Ahn Hyeongseob somehow managing to flip a grown human person????
- · Hwiseung hitting a bunch of high notes in practice and still somehow managing to not get attention from the audience
- · Mansae Team 2 (the leftover team) having low morale I just want to hug them
- · The start of Seo Sunghyuk being annoyed with his teammates starts here god bless him he just wants to start practicing
- · Sangbin laying the smackdown on the Avengers team because he doesn’t think they’re all that cool and it reaks supremely of all tea all shade
- · They showed a clip of Jihoon with Big Bang and it was cute and all too bad I don’t care about Big Bang
- · AAAAAAAAND Samuel doesn’t get the centre this time either he loses to Jihoon this is FAKE NEWS
Okay since
that’s all done I’ll go through each team that performs in this episode. I’ll
divide it up competition by competition, then go through the pre-up to the
actual performance. Then I’ll actually evaluate the performance. Finally, I’ll
say who I thought should win and who the actual winner was.
10 out of 10
Team 1
- · They called their team Full of Colours. That’s cute.
- · They have trouble with the centre. It goes from Jaechan to Jisung. It’s probably for the best.
- · That was literally their entire buildup lmao rip
- · Jisung fits the mood nicely
- · They rely a lot on gag rather than acrobatics because, to be fair, they literally cannot do any of the acrobatics. Hoolim does a nice little spin though.
- · Truthfully there’s not much going on here. It’s cute and that’s about it. There’s no standout vocals or anything.
Team 2
- · They’re called All Back and I don’t know why
- · Their buildup focuses on the tension between natural leader Noh Taehyun and actual group leader Park Woojin.
- · Like Hyeonseob looks to Taehyun for help instead of Woojin and I feel so bad for Woojin
- · Woojin literally says he doesn’t think he can be the leader because of Taehyun and my heart is breaking
- · On the whole this is much cleaner than Team 1
- · Taehyun is a far more capable main vocalist than Jaechan, Team 1’s vocalist.
- · Hyunmin is just doing what Hyunmin does best: doing mad flips n’ shit
- · Taehyun is literally doing adlibs that Team 1 decided to drop
Results
My Winner:
Team 2
Actual
Winner: Team 2
Call Me Baby
Team 1
- · Kahi tells Hyunwoo that he’s a shitty centre but I thought he did fine I don’t know what Kahi’s problem is
- · They change the centre to Kim Donghan, who’s a cutie so it’s an okay switch
- · Moonbok is a literal ray of sunlight, or, should I say, moonlight who lights on everyone and makes everything better he’s a precious angel the nation’s son
- · Seonglee’s voice is absolutely breathtaking
- · Moonbok adds so much energy I love him
- · Everyone is good but they’re the main standouts here
- · Heesok comes in a good third place though and god damn he looks like N, my man and my love, so he deserves the world
- · Moonbok on Hyunwoo’s back is #iconic and no one can tell me differently
- · Their rap together was so funny and awesome I love their bromance
Team 2
- · Dongbin’s stage fright and general nervousness is going to be the death of him one day
- · He did really bad during practice though someone please help my son
- · At least he recognizes his fault
- · I wish he wouldn’t cry though I just want to cuddle him and make sure he’s alright my child
- · They change the centre to the good Minho
- · Another issue this team has is they only have one good vocalist, which is Jinwoo. Bless his heart he tries so hard but you can tell that he’s going to hard carry this team.
- · And he does hard carry the entire performance I love you Jinwoo you deserve better
- · Dongbin fits his new part more he looks cute
- · The rappers aren’t that good either
- · They cut out so much when they aired this performance because pink haired cutie Seokyu can’t sing
My Winner:
Team 1
Actual
Winner: Team 1
The rest of
the performances are coming next episode, and for the whole they have a lot
more impact than those this episode.
They end
the episode teasing the Boy in Luv stages, so you know that’ll be one of the
last things aired in episode 4.
Random
moments
I had to
rewind several times to make sure I saw this right because I saw a beanie and
thought that it was general ball of handsomeness Kim Namhyung but, no, it’s Kim
Sangbin, who’s also alright I just really love Namhyung OK?
Like shit you could put some of that sasquatch finding music over this shit and I'd be like "Namhyung? Where"
Yes he fucking does Dongsu and I want him to be the centre we all needed him to be the centre but Daehwi and his cute ass face did us all dirty
And finally....
Thank you
for joining me for another exciting episode of Produce 101 Season 2. Yes, I
realize that the finale has already aired. In fact, I started writing this a
full 2 weeks before the finale but I have this little thing called school to
deal with (lmao spring session can kill me). I should be able to get away with
writing more reviews in the next few weeks.
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